Welcome to the Hotel Bergogliona

Rosica stood in the doorway I heard the rentboys’ cell. And I was thinking to myself "Is it Purgatory? Or is this just Hell?" Spadaro lit up a candle and he showed me the way There were giggles down the corridor I thought I heard them say:

Welcome to the Hotel Bergogliona Such a humble place (Such a humble place) Such a pious place Mercy abounds at the Hotel Bergoglionia Any kind of slack (Any kind of slack) They will cut you that.

The priests are Mapplethorpe-twisted, even those in Depends They got a lot of pretty, pretty boys … seminarians How they dance in the courtyard, sweet summer sweat Some rite to remember, some choose to forget.

So I called up the Cardinal "Please tell me you’re straight." He said, "We haven't had many such men here since nineteen-fifty-eight." And old McCarrick keeps calling from far away Wakes you up in the middle of the night Just to hear him say:

Welcome to the Hotel Bergogliona Such a yummy place (Such a yummy place) Where there’s no disgrace. They makin’ things up at the Hotel Bergogliona Time to catechize (time to catechize) Then apostasize....

Putti on the ceiling Pink chasubles and lace Martin said "We are all just bridge-builders here, to our own disgrace" And in the pontiff’s chapel They celebrate their feast Singing lots of happy, happy lies In honor of the Beast...